Thursday, August 2, 2012

Don’t Be That Mother-In-Law

May I start by saying this is not a “bash” on Mother-in-laws (MIL) article. This post was inspired to challenge daughter-in-laws before it’s too late. To challenge them to break the bad MIL wrap… and to prepare their hearts in hopes of becoming an AMAZING… what I like to call, mother-in-LOVE to your sons’ or daughters’ future spouses.

I have a dear friend who would always remind me of this cute rhyme. I’m sure some of you have heard it:

“A son’s a son until he takes a wife. But… A daughter’s a daughter for the rest of your life.”

Having both a son and daughter of my own, that rhyme always bugged me. My friend, a very wise woman, shared the way she now says the rhyme:

“A daughter’s a daughter for the rest of your life. But…a sons’ a son…If you LOVE his wife.”

My desire here is to talk about a topic that is a sore spot for many, sore for so many that jokes are abundant about the subject. Song lyrics lament the dreaded mother-in-law (i.e. Huey Luis and the News). Even movies have been made depicting the Monster-In-Law (with J-LO and Jane Fonda).

As hard and fake at times as my relationship with my MIL has been over the past 22 beautiful years that I’ve been married to her son, I must say God has used that relationship to challenge and grow me.  As a result, I VOW to be the best mother-in-LOVE to my kids spouses that I could ever be.

This short but transparent post is written in LOVE to them (my kids future spouses) before I ever even know what they look like.

And for you my new friend, this post is to challenge you to prepare your heart through prayer and supplication for your future son or daughter in-law as well.


We as moms with young kids need to break the bad MIL wrap by deciding now and becoming ourselves one day…Mothers-in-LOVE.

The in-law thing… sucks…Really who came up with that title?

Correct me if you’re not feeling it like I am, but its a throwaway title don’t you think?

It’s sorta like the messy, rude, annoying neighbor on the block… Let’s call them the neighbor-in-law; nobody really wants to get to know that neighbor anyway.

It is all this in-law stuff that has empowered me to write this article.

My kids are ages 15 & 13, but time flies so if I have to gift wrap this article as a wedding present to act as a love letter to my children’s spouses on my true desire to love them with all my heart- so be it. Or perhaps my future son & daughter in-law will have this post to smack me over my head if I ever cause any ripples, fights or tension in their marriage.

You could call it a bit of MIL insurance to remind me “Not to be that mother-in-law.”

Let’s be honest who else is talking about this topic?
There are books on marriage, raising children; self help books, fitness book, books on finance, and books for dummies: But, not a one on the mother-in law.

Well girls we’re talking about it now! And in the months to come we are going to take a journey to camp. 

I like to call it our very own mother-in-law boot camp.

A post on mother-in-law’s to be. Mothers-in-law in training,
….training to be mothers-in-LOVE. Mothers in love with the choice our children make for a spouse. Mothers modeling the love Christ showed for us by laying down his life for our sake.

I look forward over the next few months at Roo Mag to walk through God’s word together as we prepare our hearts to one day meet our children’s future spouses.

Wouldn’t it be amazing if we would all become the Mothers in Love God intended us to be!

This entry was posted in Mother by Shelene.

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